My First Love


Psalm 91 14 “Because he has set his love upon Me, therefore I will deliver him;
I will set him on high, because he has known My name.
15 He shall call upon Me, and I will answer him;

Do you remember how it felt the first time you thought you were in love? Blood rushing, butterflies in your tummy, sleeping late (or losing sleep altogether), not being able to hang up even though the conversation was over an hour ago. The joy of meeting the person and the desire to never leave their sight.

Well for me that pretty much describes the emotions I went through. It was all great until the first argument and even worse after the first heartbreak. You feel all the above intensity of emotion motivated by anger.

When I was pregnant with our first child, my husband hurt me really bad (story for another day). I can honestly say I have never felt so broken in my life. If anything being pregnant was my saving grace because I had to tell myself that I need to be strong for the baby and not ponder too deep on my hurt. It was tough but by God’s grace I made it to through the pregnancy..

One night as I was crying on the couch I started to think about a sermon my pastor once preached about how Leah in the book of Genesis, would tell herself that having babies would make Jacob love her. Its only until her fourth son Judah were her mindset changed and she decided she will praise God.

As I thought about this story the Holy Spirit started to whisper “the same way you feel neglected by your husband is the same way you have neglected your first love”

This convicted me so hard because my first love should always be Jesus. When I first received Jesus as my personal Lord and saviour at 16 I would hardly sleep diving deep into his word, I prayed and spoke to Him through out the day and could not resit talking about Him with anyone who cared to listen to all I’ve been learning and what He was teaching me. Prayers where answered almost immediately and the love I felt was so real. It moved past just emotion but bore witness with my spirit man.

The theme scripture for today’s devotion begins with a condition that follows a promise. Somewhere along the line I neglected my relationship with Jesus and started to look to man, more so my husband affection. I neglected my first love. He is my first love because He created me and sacrificed His life for my sins. There is a promise in the above scripture about what the Lord will do for us when we are in a love relationship with Him. He will deliver us, set us on High and answer us when we call.

So as I learn to “fly” (First love Yaweh) again, in all that I do, I would like for us to take this journey together. Life is so much better when Jesus is my first priority!!

Let us pray. Heavenly Father thank you that I love because you first loved me. Forgive me for neglecting to spend quality time with you and seeking from man what can ONLY truly come from you. I know that the more I seek you, the more I will find you. The more I find you I will grow in love and in turn know how to love those around me the way you desire. In Jesus name I pray. AMEN